– I enjoy listening to Z100.

– I was afraid of the dark until I was 18.

– I’ve never eaten a philly cheesesteak.

– I make mix tapes for people and never give it to them.

– I am convinced that 75% of Morrissey’s songs are about my life.

– I have to check College Humor, Facebook, and The Onion every day, in that order, or I lose my mind.

– I genuinely like watching The HIlls (Oh Whitney… so hot).

– In 1991, I thought the Ninja Turtles from TMNT II: Secret of the Ooze were real. When my mom told me they were actors, I threw a shit fit and went into denial. That was probably the death of my childhood right there.

– 15 years later, I still regret trading in my NES for a Sega Genesis.

– I think hipster girls are cute, but hipster girls that play guitar are unbelievably hot.

– If I were to be granted one wish and one wish only, it would be to have the ability to grow a sweet beard. World peace can wait.

– I don’t believe anything in the news until Jon Stewart reports it.

– You could put a gun to my head but I will not watch The Notebook.

– I’ve never eaten bacon.

– I miss Kutztown.


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